Is it normal that I can't be alone at all?
I can't be alone at all.. If I sit alone at home, I feel a wild sadness, I cry I don't know why, and as soon as someone comes I immediately feel good, my mood instantly improves.. The circumstances are such that I have to stay at home now, I only leave in the evening.. But I don't really like going out in public either, but I feel much better after that.. I may not even talk to anyone, but if I'm around someone(even a stranger, on a bus, for example), I feel better, calmer or something. And if I, for example, on the course, no one sat down at the desk, so that's it, I'm ready to burst into tears. I'm basically not an extrovert, I'm not particularly sociable, nor the soul of the company, but lately I have a wild need for people, I can't be alone with myself. What's it? Why is this happening? A question for psychologists or people who have experienced this before. In principle, I constantly have a feeling of unhappiness, but in the circle of people it somehow becomes easier. As a child, by the way, I was sent to the camp all the time, sometimes I had a bad experience(I was bullied) and I asked to go home, but no one took me away.. It happened that the whole shift was actually one, like an outcast, but there was also a successful experience when no one was poisoned and there were friends.. I'm afraid that this is something like a childhood trauma and now I'm wildly afraid of being rejected, not being among people.
All our problems, complexes and experiences come from a distant childhood. After reading your story, I am convinced of this again.
Your condition is similar to mine. But I, fortunately, coped with it. I hated being alone, and I didn't feel at ease in the company, but it was safe to have someone around.
I think that certain “stereotypes” or the image of an ideal person play a big role here. Let me explain.
In our time and in our society, it is customary to be super friendly and responsive, having a lot of friends and acquaintances. Accordingly, your brain understands that something is wrong with you (the label of an outcast), and it tries to reduce this stress, respectively, looking for some company, AT LEAST some, so as not to seem superfluous on this planet.
But, in the same problem, a new source of it opens up – complexes, self-dislike. NO one knows the answer to the question “how to love yourself”. Even the doctor. Therefore, you are forced to search for it yourself.
To become happier and more successful – you need to get out of your comfort zone, that is, enjoy a walk WITHOUT HEADPHONES WITH MUSIC, for example. Or read, embroider, or cook. You can have a pet if you are uncomfortable with people. And discuss with him how you feel and so on.
For prevention, you can contact a psychologist, there is nothing wrong with this, on the contrary, it helps a lot! But I advise you to go to several places to find the right professional.
Health! I'm sure you'll be happy.
Normal. For most of us, loneliness is one of the most terrible punishments , because solitary confinement instills great horror in people . In fact , loneliness is not as scary as it seems . I really like the expression: If you are left alone, then it's time to get to know yourself better…. The fact is that modern people almost do not think about the topic : Who am I? And this question is very important because only by answering it correctly can we come to harmony with ourselves .
And I like being alone!, I'm my own boss-do what you want! You either approve of yourself or condemn yourself for your own mistakes or mistakes! As they say, ” Your own hand is the lord!”.
It is ok. You are a classic extrovert. Your path is publicity, social work in a team. You have a direct road to the State Duma. There are your like-minded people and your rivals.
You are just physically used to the fact that the source of your happiness, joy and good mood is the people in the circle, you are used to receiving these emotions and feelings from others and not from yourself. Of course, when you are alone you are like a drug addict without a dose, you can not find this source of joy in yourself and you break, you want to return to people and get this cherished dose again. Learn to be alone with yourself, a little bit at a time, dosed, staying alone more and more often, understand what is inside you, look into these emerging feelings, consider their basis, why they bother, why you need someone from the outside for happiness and not yourself.
It's just one of the symptoms of depression, that's all, I have the same thing. Although I like this symptom, I don't want to get rid of it, it makes me the extrovert I've always wanted to be