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Revenge isn't”bad.”
Here the whole ambush lies in the fact that revenge is another move in the” dramatic triangle”, Karpman's triangle: Savior-Victim-Executioner.
And there the game goes up, the classics wrote that the triangle in its development leads to serious illness, prison or death.
The Hangman's state is just such a feeling of victorious righteousness, dArtagnan in a white cloak.�
I will not describe the mechanisms, just a big separate topic. No esotericism, just classical practical psychology. In short, you play from the role of such a righteous Executioner – with a very high probability on the next turn you will find yourself in the role of a Victim. – And the game is on the rise.
Again, I know episodes of successful revenge. But when I remember a particular avenger , well, in this situation, with this person, he had a ride, yes. Only this is a certain kind of behavior in general – and here he got a ride, and in another episode he got it himself. A sort of avenging warrior; not much happiness in that, I think… There are a lot of rakes, yes…
This is bad for a simple reason – revenge is not a neurotic healthy gesture of behavior.
Well that is:
Here I am and there is another. The other one somehow offended/hurt/left me out, but it doesn't matter what. I have a general reaction to this person. But for some reason (and this is my responsibility), I didn't react right away. Maybe he left/didn't say anything, or even something else.
But the energy remained. And here I am thinking how to take revenge on this man, because of him I am so annoyed here! Although in fact, it is my responsibility to somehow cope with my experiences. And if I don't have healthy ways of coping with feelings, then I resort to neurotic ones – I shift responsibility to another and go for revenge.
Revenge, including blood feuds, is a very important social mechanism for containing conflicts at the primitive, pre-state stage of society's existence. A large number of animals, not just humans, have the ability to take revenge, either instantly or after a while. And, indeed, revenge can very well help a person to ease his feelings of anger or resentment. But, in fact, the whole trouble is that revenge gives rise to revenge and causes an escalation of the conflict. From a personal point of view, the problem of revenge is a possible sense of guilt, or a new revenge is already in your direction, creating a wonderful cycle of struggle, from which it is difficult to get out
The first negative is quite obvious: this is retaliatory revenge, well, or censure and repression from the whole society, if something goes wrong, or is not taken into account at all.
The second one, I think, may be the inner emptiness after taking revenge. It is not a fact that the feeling of injustice will go away from this. But there may be disappointment in yourself, and thoughts that you have multiplied this global injustice.�
The third is that this can lead to a pattern of behavior. Because of which any dissatisfaction with anything in your life will be spilled out on others. Subjectively, you'll probably like it even at first. But since you have not only an animal nature, but also a rational one, this will aggravate your internal conflict: “I want to take revenge, but I guess/suspect that this is not the right thing to do.” Well, the reaction of others will be quite predictable.�
In general, I would recommend keeping your inner beast on a short leash and letting it go only when it benefits you. Otherwise, one day it may turn out that you are not his master, but he is yours. This does not mean that you should always be a good girl, on the contrary: in order to remain yourself and maintain balance, steam needs to be released periodically. But it is also necessary to control the vaporization. I hope I got the message across.