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Sometimes, in order to solve such a problem, it is enough to change the rhetoric. “Renounce” is a very strong word and a very ambiguous action. Renouncing is difficult, and in some cases also contradicts the inner values of a person.
If you don't need your regrets, then you can let them go, leave them, put them off, and finally deal with them later, if you have the strength and desire). Try to think about them that way, maybe you'll get some ideas.
By the way, a funny association has arisen. Many years ago, I attended (I wasn't a participant, I just stopped by for a couple of hours) a personal growth training course. There was an exercise where a bunch of helium balloons were brought into the hall, people took them apart and wrote on each one that they wanted to let go of their lives. Then they all went out on the porch of the building where the training was held. Summer, sun, blue sky – and then everyone let go of the balloons. The balloons flew up, it was very beautiful. But, I must admit, I didn't expect much effect after this exercise. And that's probably why I was very surprised when I met some of the participants six months later. All of them stated that they “let go” of the problems that were bothering them.
Regret is a negative experience. The truth of life is that without the negative, there is no positive. You can use a negative minus sign to create a positive plus sign. There are objective reasons that lead us to the bad and the good, it's like the seeds that we sow in life. Naturally, we want to sow only good grain, so that we can later harvest good fruit for us. But when we start to sow, it turns out that we have tares in our hand, along with good seeds. Of course, we don't need them, and we subconsciously try to separate the chaff from the grain. But how to do this if you need to sow right now? In other words, we need to act now, because the circumstances require it. So, regrets negatively affect us, holding us back from acting out for fear of negative consequences. As soon as you learn to see that the good has come out of the negative, you will immediately give up all your regrets.
Perhaps we are talking about the “regrets” that a person has been dragging behind him in recent years like a suitcase without a handle.
Or it is better to make out such a metaphor: – as a dung beetle pushes a ball of manure in front of it and the longer it rolls, the bigger the ball becomes. And the harder it is to push. And these regrets are a part of my life and leave them on the one hand a sorry life lived, and on the other hand, I'm already used to pushing, and my hands are busy and work fills the time and the ball of manure closes from the bright light.
What happens if you just leave that ball of regret behind and move on without it? Immediately empty hands will create discomfort – where to put them?!
Yes, and the first thing you want to do again is choose the road past regretsmanure and start collecting a new ball !! From scratch. So why throw in the old one!?
The conclusion seems clear: Every problem has a reason (as the Buddha said) Every problem can be solved if you find a reason – why are you so drawn to feeling sorry for yourself?! And when do you feel sorry for yourself? Track each incident as a smoker tracks the habit of pulling out a cigarette and flicking the lighter to smoke habitually.
If you want to stop regretting, quit smoking and hit yourself on the hands every time you start grabbing the drug again to stop the withdrawal.
A week of abstinence is enough and the craving for regret will be halved. Another week – twice that. Still…
Alcoholism and gambling addiction are treated in much the same way.
It's important to understand what your goal is when you want to give up your regrets. Due to the fact that this clarification is not included in the question, I will assume that regretting what did not happen or did not happen correctly probably takes up too much time and consumes too much energy. The energy that could be spent on a full life, with new events, impressions, new ideas, goals, dreams and their implementation. By filling your life with regrets, you keep the past in focus, and so avoid the future.. New regrets are born.. Looking to the future can be too scary, maybe there is no understanding of where to go next and how.. But here, everyone chooses where to look. And renouncing is not useful, mostly. It is better to answer the question why you are doing this and choose a more effective tactic for achieving the goal.
No way. Only time can cure this, but other regrets will appear during this time. It will be running in circles. If someone offers you a ready-made recipe, you can safely call this person a charlatan.
I threw the hook, threw the line, threw the stick.
I remember it, it was like yesterday.
As never before the spinner suddenly stretched
And then I accidentally hooked a mermaid.
I pulled out a live partisan from the bottom
He didn't know, poor fellow, that the war was over.
Once baba ordered me a carp
As a result, I only caught three feathers.- Willy Tokarev.
https://stihi.ru/2020/08/15/2811
Accept it, take it for granted, and move on. People tend to make mistakes.�
And it is not necessary to renounce, it is harmful for the psyche. Strive for the truth, especially in front of yourself.�
Renouncing your regrets is a path to cruelty.
And what will it look like? In words like this: “I regret that I once regretted what I did., well, something like that. Regret is a kind of remorse for having done something wrong. But time has passed and a person says: “here I am a fool, I repented, I was sorry, I was worried, I was a ram, I shouldn't have been so sorry.” Of course, you can stop regretting your actions, but this is if the heart hardens, because out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks and the hands do according to the command of the heart.