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It depends on our internal content. And from the current state of this content )
In principle, a person should have enough energy for any interaction. I came to work, did everything and even more, then on the way home I took the cat out of the tree, separated the fighting boys and made up, moved my grandmother across the road (!), met a neighbor at the house and dragged her bags to the top floor, called my mother, helped the children with lessons, helped a friend with phone advice, and so on.
In general, he healed the crippled, forgave the harlot, fed five thousand hungry people with five loaves of bread, etc.
But energy is permanently drained from a person by two things: neuroses and social race.
Neurosis forces you to spend energy on containing internal unconscious conflict, and the social race-on competition with others.
As a result, a modern person has just enough energy to crawl along the route “home – work – gym – cafe – home”. What are the calls to my mother and the cat in the tree?..
So it's not a question of whether our contemporary should, but whether it can. Can not. Unfortunately.
Of course, there are exceptions.�
it is not necessary to help in such a volume, after which you yourself will join the ranks of those in need of help.�
you should not help someone who is disgusting to you, such help will only make both of them worse. It's better to help someone else.�
you should not help someone with whose activities you personally disagree. If you are a pacifist, then it is a bad idea to finance the purchase of equipment for volunteer fighters. And if you are a believer, then you should not pay for what is condemned by your religion.
do not help in a situation where your help will not be a help, but rather the opposite. So, for these reasons, you should not give beggars in the subway – they themselves will not receive this money, and at the expense of compassionate passengers, this vile business flourishes. In which the beggars themselves are almost slaves. You can help by contacting centers that will help a person break out. Similarly with toxic charity.
it is not necessary to help those who are far away at the expense of those who are near. If you have a sick child at home, and you jumped out for a couple of minutes to the pharmacy, then spending two hours opening the slammed door of a neighbor is clearly a bad idea.�
do not help where your help will change less than you are willing to accept. Yes, investing in the quality of life of a palliative patient is noble and good, but if you break down over the realization that no amount of money will help them survive, they will still die in a few months – it's better to help someone else, where you can really cure them.�
you should not help with a “direct solution” where there is already someone who should solve this problem, but for some reason does not solve it. It is better to influence this someone. So, if it's dirty around the house – you don't need to hold a subbotnik, you need to figure out why the janitor doesn't do his job. And if there are no diapers in the orphanage , you need to raise the question of where the money allocated by the state for this purpose went.�
Attempts to help with a “direct solution” (to hold a subbotnik, buy diapers for volunteers ' money) just make the problem worse: the responsible person remembers what he has done, and next time expects that he will do it again.
You need to help only in good deeds. Helping evil people, even if they ask us for help, is aiding evil, which greatly spoils us, if not the body, then the soul. So you need to think three times before rushing to the rescue.
European countries are now concerned about the same issue when dealing with refugees. And you can see how painful the choice is for them, and how different countries behave on this issue, from completely ignoring other people's problems, to accepting all those in need to the detriment of personal interests.�
In general, any help �(not professional, i.e. You don't get paid for it) is associated with infringement of personal interests and expenses. So the question here is the degree of greed.Therefore, there are saints who are willing to give everything to the needy, and there are non-saints who adjust their actions to the degree of their greed.�
But in general, the answer is that we should help everyone, this is a sign of a civilized person. But it must be done in the mind. Know how to help? When can I help you? who can I help? so as not to harm others, because people often do not understand what kind of help they really need. In general, I vote for reason and selflessness.
This is a very difficult question. Let's just say that I solved it for myself in the following way. There is a certain main business, by investing in which I can “help others” as effectively as possible, and this business is the business of my life. For example, I am a microbiologist inventing a vaccine against a deadly infection that could save the lives of tens of thousands of people. Here in kontaktik I see a request to make a repost, they say Vasya is three years old, needs a kidney, heart, spleen transplant in Austria, costs 15mn. I understand that if you sell my entire laboratory, then Vasya will have enough for the operation. So what do I do? That's right — I send Vasya to the account of 100 rubles. Ten minutes later, my neighbor, Grandma Nina, rings my doorbell and asks me to remove her Badger from the tree, spend a good hour of my precious time, during which hundreds of people die from the terrible infection from which I invent a vaccine, and tear their pants in addition. What am I doing? That's right — I'll delegate it to any nearby schoolboy. Well, etc.
An important principle is not to ignore people. Even if I can't help, I can sincerely apologize. The second important principle is to have a schedule and really understand how many hours a day I should devote to the most important thing in my life, and then everything else. The third important principle is to really evaluate your strength. If today, even in my free time, I am so reminded of others that tomorrow I will not get out of bed-you should refuse.
The body and mind are like a bicycle. If you have a bicycle and you give it to everyone indiscriminately to ride — it won't last long. If the bike has no purpose, it may not matter. But if you drive it to work — trouble. If you have a real business in your life, it is better to devote yourself to it as much as possible, and thereby help everyone. But if all of a sudden your job is to help everyone with anything, well, you can also remove badgers from trees.
We don't owe anyone anything at all. If you find it difficult to help someone, or you just don't want to do something, then no one should blame you for it. :*
The main thing is to understand two things, you can help if: you do not act to the detriment of yourself. Because if you hurt yourself in something, then you will blame the person you helped. And secondly, you should do it selflessly, that is, do not wait for thanks and other things. Otherwise, it is no longer a help, not a good thing, but a service. �Then negotiate prices on the beach. Help, sincere help, this is a spiritual impulse.