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First, give vent to all your emotions. Cry, beat your fists and feet against the wall, in short, do everything to get the energy out. Emptying yourself emotionally is the most important part of coming to terms with death. As soon as you realize that you can control yourself at least in close proximity to your loved ones, start doing something active that requires full attention and full employment: go to work and work for allowances that you may not need: the main thing is to forget yourself and immerse yourself in another world; start doing new hobbies, from drawing to writing and filming; go on a trip, etc. The longer your process of such a “distraction” from thoughts of loss, the less time you will have to think like ” What if I then…”, the sooner the long-awaited humility will come and you will be able to live without this burden in your soul. Well, or at least make it easier repeatedly.