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If you ask me, I generally don't accept the word “cheating” in the context of a romantic relationship. A kiss is a kiss, it is physical contact, communication of bodies, mutual pleasure. And if the person I love, someone gave pleasure, I do not understand why I should cause a negative, and even more so feel that in relation to me there was an infidelity? (what am I, the Austrian Empire or something, so that I can be cheated on?)
Yes, of course!
The thought is already material.
And then there's the obvious physical touch.
People made up all these rules themselves.
So you need to match.
Think before you commit.
Yes, of course!
The thought is already material.
And then there's the obvious physical touch.
People made up all these rules themselves.
So you need to match.
Think before you commit.
It seems to me that this depends on many factors: age, duration of the relationship, the person's feelings from this kiss and the presence of a” continuation of the banquet ” after it. Some people forgive their(her) faithful (s) a kiss, if it was not followed by a violent sexual act. For them,perhaps,the kiss has lost the sacred meaning that it has, for example, for teenagers. Sometimes it is not considered treason if it happens in an intoxicated state. As for me, a kiss is still treason, because sometimes a more or less serious relationship begins with it. This is the moment when you began to trust each other, and you can not betray him.
For me, cheating is something moral. If a person in their right mind and clear memory wants another person, whether it's a kiss, sex, or just socializing and flirting, that person and I should separate. The fact is that when a person is looking for someone else, it means that they miss you.�
And it's not worse when people dream about someone else behind your back. This is called betrayal of feelings.
Of course, a drunk kiss is not the most pleasant thing. It's damned insulting and insulting, but loyalty is also in the head. This is the stage of aversion to other people's touch. This is correspondence even when life is thundering and noisy around you. A person will not allow himself to get drunk to a bestial state if he knows that he will not control himself and may cause pain to his love.
Once you can forgive such a kiss “drunk”, but the second one is no longer there.
Cheating starts when you prioritize the other person a little lower than your own desires.
Here's an anecdote for you. They say, from life.
he wants to get her to have sex.
She's like: well, yes, yes… in general, yes… but current in the mouth.
he's so awesome: what's wrong?
She's like, I have a boyfriend and I don't cheat on him.
With a kiss, I think, about the same.
Before answering this question, I will turn to the concept of “treason”. A person may consider their partner “cheated” if::
1) he / she treats the partner as an object (such as a car, mobile phone, etc.);
2) he / she performs actions that are contrary to the partner's EXPECTATIONS;
I will start with the first attitude, as to a literal material thing. Everything is quite simple to understand, rather than for practical use. When a partner treats her/ him, for various reasons, as a thing, then subconsciously, he / she will consider him / her “his / her property”. If it is a property, then it is “mine”. Once “mine”, respectively, all those who are in contact with “mine”, by definition, are “strangers”. �From the moment of defining “mine-someone else's”, a complete dissonance begins.�
It so happened that a person is accustomed to trusting the material world and the manifested objects that he notices. He gives them certain qualities, perceives them according to a certain functionality, and chooses them, most often, out of consumer desire. That is, to consume.�
He meets a person who becomes an object, and therefore is perceived as a literal object, given the description above. And then … and then inside himself, he tries to do the impossible-to forbid a living person, with different desires, fantasies, principles, beliefs, to become an empty box that will respond only to his personal needs, react and admire only him, desire only him. Which is absurd and impossible. Unless this person is going to make something like slavery out of their relationship.
The second relationship, which causes a contradiction of the expected, is related to the conflict of the internal description. This means that he / she has an accurate verbal description of all the actions of the partner that he/she wants to see in a particular situation. With precision, down to the smallest step, word, raising an arm or leg. But, again, this description occurs subconsciously, and on a conscious level, only certain parts of the whole picture can be determined as separate puzzles. And individual puzzles are torn fragments from the general chain of subconscious description, which cause feelings of infidelity or jealousy. Because they are fragments, and do not find a common logic with the master / mistress of the hidden description.
And one more important point that stands before p. 1 and p. 2, and most often, is the cause of the cause)))
When the evoked feeling of falling in love, from partner to partner or vice versa, is caused by non-recognition of one's own quality/ability/manifestation. That is, the lover sees in her / him the quality/ability/manifestation that he can not recognize in himself, is afraid or does not see. Accordingly, finding confirmation in another person that such an ability really exists in life and can be applied, he / she falls in love with it, with the ability. But the bottom line is that the ability is in the manifestation of another person and is also controlled by this person who has it. Therefore, he / she subconsciously wants to control him / her as a visible manifestation of the ability. But this does not work and will not happen. Therefore, uncontrolled observation of such a manifestation develops into jealousy or infidelity.
And answering the author's question, whether a kiss is considered treason, my personal answer is no.
You need to understand that real infidelity occurs long before a person performs any action, it occurs inside him, then it does not matter what it will be: a look, a touch, a kiss or sexual contact.�
This subtle psychology was very accurately expressed by Jesus Christ in Matthew 5: 28: “Whoever looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.�
We are all people with our own passions and temptations come to us every second, the fact of our desire and intention is important here.�
I saw / and you on the street beautiful / wow girl / guy, look and then you either can catch yourself on this thought and reject it immediately, get distracted-because you are loyal to your man, or you can start “staring” and “fantasizing”, it is clear that this is only the initial stage, but vice, like a sprout, starts small, but inevitably grows into more, if you do not pull it out.�
Infidelity is like a disease: it is not necessary that it somehow manifests itself externally, but it is there. So there is no “health”, no love.
For everyone, the concept of “treason” is different. But for me personally, a kiss is cheating. If there is a desire to kiss someone, then there may be a desire for more sooner or later.
There are different kinds of kisses. You can give me a peck on the cheek as a sign of gratitude or just out of politeness. Or you can kiss passionately, wetly and for a long time in French. In this case, it's a completely different matter.
Well, the concept of treason is different for everyone.
I could let you answer it yourself, but why, since Janusz Vishnevsky did it for me:
I believe that it all depends on your thoughts that if you imagine your loved one in your place-he will kiss someone – will this be considered cheating or not? in general, this is a terribly disgusting and stupid word, completely inappropriate in meaning, let alone “betrayal”
A kiss is physical contact, but I find it wrong to mistake physical contact for cheating.
Infidelity is primarily a psychological thing: I mean, you cheated on your lover even and only when you thought about it before making physical contact.
For example, if on a bus you grabbed someone's ass with gusto because of an abrupt stop, then this does not count, and if you deliberately approached and did it with the desire to do it, then you changed it.
Therefore, for example, some people forgive “drunk cheating”, because the person came into contact without realizing it.
Well, for example, of course, I would not consider a kiss with a friend/friend to be cheating, if it does not have a love subtext.
The concept of infidelity is an individual issue. For some, this is any physical contact, for others, an emotional manifestation is enough. So, for example, one person may forgive their partner for having drunk sex, but they will never forgive them if they start paying more attention and care to someone else than to them, or even just take someone else's side in an argument. The very word “treason” implies this. There are no clear limits and boundaries of morality and ethics. These nuances should be discussed with your lover. And only his point of view on the situation is the last instance in this matter.
Well, if you were kissed on the cheek, then most likely you will be forgiven. Well, if you put your tongue down someone's throat, then, I'm sorry -this is treason in my understanding. A kiss is an emotional component of a relationship. A kiss is a kind of first step in building them. With the first kiss, we want to show that we really like this or that person, with a kiss the prelude to sex begins, and with a kiss the infidelity begins. You can, of course, say that it didn't mean anything, and in general we were drunk, sorry, nonsense. If you are happy with your person, then what is it that “attracts you to the lips” of another or another?
It depends on how trusting your relationship with your partner is. More than once, my wife and I went to parties where we pretended not to be a couple and during some dances I was kissed by girls. My wife treats this calmly, because infidelity, for me, is a betrayal of feelings. Let's just say that I would not be able to forgive cheating in terms of sex, because for me personally, sex is not just carnal, roughly speaking. I don't have sex myself if I don't feel love or infatuation for a person, and this already turns out to be cheating on my feelings, that is, the feeling that the other person has become more important than the one you are with now. So it all depends only on your relationship with your partner. For someone, a kiss can also be an intimate thing that he gives only to a loved one, and therefore can react very painfully to a kiss with someone else.