2 Answers

  1. In my opinion, the most worthy and at the same time the most difficult response to rudeness is calm, ignore and agree with rudeness. Least of all I support the method of humor (because it has the component of passive aggression, which means that you respond to rudeness and rudeness in the same way and “go down”).

    The Buddha's parables on this topic are very useful:�

    Once the Buddha passed by a village. People gathered around him started shouting insults at him. They used all sorts of obscenities, all those terse words from their meager vocabulary.

    The Buddha, standing there, listened to them in silence and very carefully, and then said:

    • Thank you for coming to meet me, but I'm in a hurry. I need to get to the next village in time, they're already waiting for me there. I can't pay much attention to you today, but tomorrow, on the way back, we will have time to talk. Tomorrow you can all come together and tell me what you didn't have time to say today. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to hurry.

    The peasants could not believe their ears and eyes: this man remained completely calm, balanced. Someone broke down:
    “Are you deaf?” We insult you with our last words, and you don't react at all.
    The Buddha replied:
    “If you wanted an answer, you came too late. You should have come ten years ago, then I would have answered you. But over the past ten years, I've learned not to be provoked. I stopped being a slave, I became my own master.

    I do what I want, not anyone else. I live in harmony with my soul.

    I can't be forced to do anything against my will.

    I don't hold it against you. You can be happy with yourself, you have done a good job.

    But personally, I don't take your insults, and until I start to take them, they will remain empty words.

    • Throw a burning torch into the river. It will burn until it touches the water. As soon as it touches the surface, the river will immediately extinguish it. I became a river. You're throwing insults in my direction. They are full of fire, but as soon as they reach me, the fire goes out in my coolness. Insults can no longer burn me. You drop the thorns, falling into my silence, they turn into flowers.

    I do what my heart tells me to do.�

    The villagers of another village greeted me, bringing flowers, fruits, and sweets. I told them, ” Thank you, but we've already had breakfast. Take these fruits with my blessing to yourself. We can't carry them with us, we don't carry food with us.” Now I ask you, ” What should they do with what I didn't accept and gave them back?”

    One person in the crowd said:
    – They probably took it home, and at home they distributed fruit and sweets to their children, their families.

    The Buddha smiled:
    “What will you do with your insults and curses?” I don't accept them. If I refuse those fruits and sweets, they have to take them back. What can you do? I reject your insults, so you take your cargo home and do whatever you want with it.

  2. I have always believed that if the response to rudeness contains a certain amount of wit, irony, and resourcefulness, then this legalizes some of the rudeness as permissible. However, in practice, you should always take into account the circumstances and the object to which your response is directed.

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