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Self-discipline and willpower from scratch develops only in an infant, and only there is a criterion of “zero”. In an adult, these qualities will be present even in a rudimentary state, since getting life experience everyone develops them in themselves, another question is whether someone is better or worse. If the question is raised from “zero”, then the infant and later the child who has not reached a conscious age copies the behavior of parents and other people close to him. My own example of self-discipline and willpower will encourage the child to develop these qualities and vice versa. As the child uses these qualities, they need to be supported by adult approval, which will increase motivation in their use and development.
And what happened to you or to you if you lived without self-discipline and will until this moment, and now you suddenly ask yourself this question? So there is a goal, which means that there is a meaning for you personally in some action. So hold on to it. A human being is a meaning-oriented being. If you find meaning, then even a difficult activity can sparkle with new colors. Meaning is the answer to the question ” why?”. Why did you need the will and self-discipline at this stage of life, in this action? What's the point for you? What will be good, how will your life change when you do this?�
In order to develop self-discipline and willpower from scratch, you need your desire to achieve this. You need to start small; at the beginning, write out the schedule of the day yourself, wake up at a certain time and go to bed at a certain time, and do this for a certain time. After fixing this, you can move on to the next one. Do daily morning exercises, etc. “You can't change your life overnight. But overnight, you can change the thoughts that will change your life forever.” With respect.
A short excerpt from the book “Nikola Tesla. Some personal memories.”
The possibilities of willpower and self-control were extremely appealing to my vivid imagination, and I began to discipline myself. If I had a cookie or a juicy apple that I was dying to eat, I would give it to another boy and experience the Tantalum torment, with pain but also satisfaction. If I was faced with a grueling task, I would jump on it again and again until I was done. So I practiced day after day, from morning to night. At first it required a strong mental effort directed against inclinations and desires, but as the years passed, this contradiction weakened, and finally my will and desire became one and the same. They are still like that today, and this is the secret of all my success. These experiences are so closely related to my discovery of the rotating magnetic field that they seem to have formed an essential part of it; if it hadn't been for her, I would never have invented the induction motor.
Paul Karikh gave a good answer, I will allow myself to add a little.
The “do without thinking” phase should be very short in my opinion (for example, a week). Here you ran for a week, then sit down and reflect. Has anything changed? Be both honest (“outwardly, the result is still invisible”) and resourceful (“but I kind of became(a) sleep better and I feel so good after a run!”). It is important to find a positive result, this is enough to keep you motivated for another week or two. Then connect external factors: tell your friends or in social networks.remember that you (you can embellish) “almost a month running!”. Support is provided to you, and it is already more inconvenient to quit, people know and are interested. Often remind yourself of the benefits of what you are doing, think about future improvements and the fact that ” it's already a pity to quit.” There, you see, the first noticeable results will appear, there will be no experience, the once unloved business will become a habit…and it will get easier!
Every time I'm too lazy to do something, I remember my favorite quote: “There are no lazy people. There are goals that don't inspire you.”
Properly prioritized is the best motivator.
What attention is paid to grows and develops.
Hence, step 1: pay attention to this on a daily basis.
Willpower is Freedom Of Choice. Therefore, exercise this Freedom every day.
To do this, a) decide on the context and your individual preferences in it, and b) time after time, persistently choose them in your life, and not what is “accepted” by the majority or “right” to choose based on the opinion of authorities or your past habits.
If, for example, will-power want to train in the issues of “self-esteem” through the ability to defend themselves with words from those who are rude (a), in those moments when this rudeness is the place to be (and earlier annoyance was propertyvalues), now to persevere and beautiful to stand up to a bully (to confirm your New Selection). If there are no such skills YET, then choose to get them (instead of the standard”no time” or “it's impossible”) and then practice them (b).
© Artem Veda
Most likely, not from scratch, because a person already has some willpower anyway.
My favorite way is to just take it and do it, without giving yourself time to think, come up with excuses and everything else. Our brain is very good at making excuses for anything, and the more time it has to do it, the better the excuses will be.
If you understand that something needs to be done, then start doing it as quickly as possible. It is much easier not to have time to come up with an excuse than to overcome yourself when the excuse is already there.
That is, start literally thinking less and doing more in those areas where you lack willpower (then, of course, you will have to start thinking, but you need to get overclocked). Can't go out for a jog in the morning when you look out the window? Get up and get dressed right away without looking out the window.
It is clear that you should not break into thoughtless actions, and you need to work with your head. But often you enter the phase of weak will when you already understand what needs to be done, but you don't want to do it.
It is very important not to confuse motivation and discipline. Discipline is not when you want to do what you don't want to do. This is when you just take and do what you need to do.
You can't decide to call someone for a long time, because you are thinking about possible answers and what will happen? Just dial the number, and then you can't get out of it.
A more general approach is any sport. It takes a while to develop self-discipline and willpower, but it is more reliable.
If you want to understand the underlying mechanisms – what is willpower and why someone has less of it, someone has more, how to develop it and what its lack leads to-I highly recommend Kelly McGonigal's book ” Willpower. How to develop and strengthen”. It's hard to read, but this is really a very thorough study, which is accompanied by specific tips on what to do.
I developed them (more or less, I would still like to, it's over) thanks to sports and, oddly enough, diet. I made a lot of effort there, but now the rest doesn't seem impossible.
Splitting up an elephant is a great idea! I remembered the first ascent of the Oshten peak 2800 m, I never thought, I did not believe that this was possible. I just went and solved difficult tasks, how to hold on, how to pass more easily as I entered. Dividing a global task into small ones, solving tasks at the moment, with a break, you achieve the unimaginable! The main thing is to move with interest “what will happen next?” and don't quit! This is one of the biggest experiences and breakthroughs of my life.
Our psychologist at MIPT said in a recent lecture that the easiest way to do something if you are too lazy is to set a hard deadline for the task — 2 hours. Two hours is enough to complete any small part or even the whole task. During this short period of time, you do not need to be distracted either by Vkontakte or by anything at all. After 2 hours, just stop your activity and do what you want — play CS:GO, watch a movie, funny pictures in VK, or whatever you usually do. It seems to me that this method is just the same, from scratch.
You don't need to set big goals for yourself. For example, I lost 15 kg of weight. But I didn't set myself that goal. The goal was to lose 200 – 500 grams of weight a day, and not add much on the weekend.
An astronomical goal eliminates any effort — well, what are these 200 grams, when the goal is 15, 20 or 30 kilograms.
The same thing worked when I quit smoking. The main thing is not to smoke today, but tomorrow we will see.
Starting from scratch means being born again. Otherwise, it is no longer zero, but some kind of plus or minus. But in any case, you need a mentor, guru or sensei who will keep you strict until you develop healthy habits: get up early, eat at the same time, exercise, etc. It is better to start this as early as possible in childhood (from the age of 5). Otherwise, special measures will have to be applied. A good example is the movie “Drunk Master” with Jackie Chan or ” Shaolin Temple with Jet Li. There, students are engaged in seemingly all sorts of nonsense, water is poured, rice is cooked, or something so incomprehensible. But the result is that the mind and willpower develop. That is, the basis of self-discipline is discipline, which means being under the guidance of a more advanced person.
Here is a good video on this topic youtube.com
To do this, you must first learn to suppress your willpower. For example, you can respond to each of your achievements like this:
You need to repeat these words to yourself every time it seemed that you did something meaningful or useful. The more carefully you perform this exercise, the more will you will have.