Not everything that is presented to you as a value is such. In my understanding, values are a certain set of things, concepts, knowledge, attitudes, etc.that have an unambiguous positive meaning, importance, and bring specific benefits and benefits. That is, before becoming a value, something passes your personal selection for usefulness, importance and significance for life. In this sense, there can be no values that are not “our own” or “fake”. And it does not matter where it came from-from outside, the result of a spiritual experience or a deep analysis. For example, all values are imposed on children by their parents. Some values remain for life, and some cease to be so over time.
In general, I believe that “values” are always imposed. We “in the scoop” were taught to “have values”. For me, this is about morality, morality, “social desirability”, “approval from someone out there”. In practice, a person with “values” can also be principled, categorical, dogmatic, that is, “fixed”.
Any “value” is relative. “Here” – fits, “there” – interferes.
The Edit project was created specifically for this purpose.:�izm.io
Here, the content of various values is separated from the stereotypes associated with names, titles, and special terms. You first make a choice, and only then you will find out what name it is associated with. And self-identification can be very different from reality.
“Imposed” – this usually means that they are not very suitable for you, that you have accepted such values under pressure, under the threat of something. And not only that, you got used to them by force, through “nehochu” fearing threats of use of force.
But! “Imposed” values can be useful to you and not cause rejection throughout your life.
Such as an imposed music school, an imposed football section, or an imposed compliance with traffic rules.
And they can constantly interfere with life, harm the body. A typical case is described as “the body conflicts with the body” for example, the imposed value of “Never lose” may come into conflict with the desire to start something new, or finally get out of a dirty room with a computer and start doing something, or else…
The main criterion of obsession is the benefit or harm of your life.
Everything that makes you and your life stronger, better and more perfect is a useful value. Everything that makes it rotten, dying and idle is an imposed harmful value.
In any case, a person acquires values from society. So “his values” are those that suit a person and make him happier, and “imposed” values are those that a person has “absorbed” unconsciously and that interfere with him.
Probably, if the values fit harmoniously into your personality (that is, there are no contradictions with your desires, your life experience and conclusions drawn from it, etc.), if you realize that you choose and form your own worldview and determine the weight of certain values-then everything is in order. Otherwise, you should look for where you got “other people's” values. It is quite possible that this was followed by someone authoritative for you, for example, one of your parents. It may have worked for him, but it doesn't necessarily work for you. By the way, such search becomes faster in the company of a psychologist (for example, a gestalt therapist).
In my answer, I relied on my intuitive understanding of what you mean by the word “values”, so I may not be accurate. 🙂
If a person is not religious, then, accordingly, he can not have any internal values of his own (all imposed by society) – except for purely biological ones. These are, for example, helping “your own”, taking care of children (and everything that looks like them – kittens and puppies), “do not look into the eyes of an alpha male”….
For a religious person, values are written in the appropriate religious books.
Not everything that is presented to you as a value is such.
In my understanding, values are a certain set of things, concepts, knowledge, attitudes, etc.that have an unambiguous positive meaning, importance, and bring specific benefits and benefits.
That is, before becoming a value, something passes your personal selection for usefulness, importance and significance for life. In this sense, there can be no values that are not “our own” or “fake”. And it does not matter where it came from-from outside, the result of a spiritual experience or a deep analysis.
For example, all values are imposed on children by their parents. Some values remain for life, and some cease to be so over time.
Honestly, I don't know how.
You can read about “congruence” and “ego-synth” – what is close to you, and what contradicts and violates integrity.
You can fill out tests for values like “PVA” or “Father” and compare them with your worldview.
Read more in this post
https://yandex.ru/q/question/kakie_priznaki_psikhicheskoi_i_zrelosti_0759e0b0/?answer_id=a5b58993-ecce-4005-b2e1-231d45f4c6ad&utm_medium=share&utm_campaign=answer#a5b58993-ecce-4005-b2e1-231d45f4c6ad
In general, I believe that “values” are always imposed. We “in the scoop” were taught to “have values”. For me, this is about morality, morality, “social desirability”, “approval from someone out there”. In practice, a person with “values” can also be principled, categorical, dogmatic, that is, “fixed”.
Any “value” is relative. “Here” – fits, “there” – interferes.
The Edit project was created specifically for this purpose.:�izm.io
Here, the content of various values is separated from the stereotypes associated with names, titles, and special terms. You first make a choice, and only then you will find out what name it is associated with. And self-identification can be very different from reality.
This can be done with a worldview:�ideal.izm.io
With political views:�polit.izm.io
With brand preferences:�brand.izm.io
“Imposed” – this usually means that they are not very suitable for you, that you have accepted such values under pressure, under the threat of something. And not only that, you got used to them by force, through “nehochu” fearing threats of use of force.
But! “Imposed” values can be useful to you and not cause rejection throughout your life.
Such as an imposed music school, an imposed football section, or an imposed compliance with traffic rules.
And they can constantly interfere with life, harm the body. A typical case is described as “the body conflicts with the body” for example, the imposed value of “Never lose” may come into conflict with the desire to start something new, or finally get out of a dirty room with a computer and start doing something, or else…
The main criterion of obsession is the benefit or harm of your life.
Everything that makes you and your life stronger, better and more perfect is a useful value. Everything that makes it rotten, dying and idle is an imposed harmful value.
In any case, a person acquires values from society. So “his values” are those that suit a person and make him happier, and “imposed” values are those that a person has “absorbed” unconsciously and that interfere with him.
Probably, if the values fit harmoniously into your personality (that is, there are no contradictions with your desires, your life experience and conclusions drawn from it, etc.), if you realize that you choose and form your own worldview and determine the weight of certain values-then everything is in order. Otherwise, you should look for where you got “other people's” values. It is quite possible that this was followed by someone authoritative for you, for example, one of your parents. It may have worked for him, but it doesn't necessarily work for you. By the way, such search becomes faster in the company of a psychologist (for example, a gestalt therapist).
In my answer, I relied on my intuitive understanding of what you mean by the word “values”, so I may not be accurate. 🙂
If a person is not religious, then, accordingly, he can not have any internal values of his own (all imposed by society) – except for purely biological ones. These are, for example, helping “your own”, taking care of children (and everything that looks like them – kittens and puppies), “do not look into the eyes of an alpha male”….
For a religious person, values are written in the appropriate religious books.