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I believe that people who try to hurt them really want attention from others and sometimes their victims.
Let's remember our school days. The most shebutnye “tease” calm and quiet, sometimes even scored for this very reason. Their response to abusers is usually trivial. And it all goes on until the scoundrels get smarter…will they get smarter?
And everything goes from there. There is no way out. Reflections. Exactly. Calm people – phlegmatic-melancholic or sanguine, or choleric, or a mixture of them (most often) with a light and quiet character. Bullies are different from them, they are more hot-tempered, cheeky and arrogant in everything. They, because of ignorance, do not understand why these individuals are somewhere on the sidelines and in their thoughts, and not with them together, carry the class in the presence of the teacher and in her absence.
Unfortunately, not everyone can be reined in even during their school years, and these little hooligans turn into big ones. Alas. Ah. We all have to deal with them. All sorts of various assaults in public places – this is the very “joke” that came out of childhood. Only adults who have already taken place do not understand that we are all different and we need to respect not only ourselves in this world.
Sometimes there are other reasons.
But that's a different story altogether…
All the best)
Calm, kind people often cause unconscious irritation in those who are their complete opposite: twitchy, angry, aggressive. Why – because against the background of calmness and kindness, you feel your own problems more strongly. After all, what is “humiliate”? To humiliate is to intuitively understand that a person is higher than you, try to bring him down to your level, and better – and even lower. So to speak, to resonate with it.
In addition, calm and kind people often give the impression of those who will not be able to fight back, and therefore-you can have fun, and you will not get anything for it. This impression is deeply erroneous. Such a person can tolerate and justify the behavior of someone who is trying to humiliate him for a long time. He can simply stop contacting us so as not to lead to a scandal. But there are a number of situations where the reaction will be very, very strong.
People with personal problems are looking for opportunities to take their anger and negativity out on others.
People who are kind and calm cause them to feel that they can safely mock themselves, throw off their anger. Some people also call it “energy vampirism”
They try to humiliate not the kind and calm, but those who allow themselves to be humiliated. Not every kind and calm person comes out of a state of kindness and peace for a long time. Some come out so actively that you'll regret it later))
But since the abuser is statistically faster to run into problems with the angry and nervous humiliated, he, of course, prefers to poison the kind and calm. They are divided into two types::
1) those who slow down with the answer in the first place due to the fact that they sincerely “do not catch up”, that they are already humiliated
2) those who slow down with the answer primarily due to the fact that they have a high threshold of emotional sensitivity
The first is treated by life experience. The second is more of a blessing than a curse.
Because people think they can't fight back and stand up for themselves. Indeed, for the most part, it is easier for calm, kind people to remain silent, swallow another insult, than to enter into a conflict. And you can't call it a disadvantage or advantage – it's just such a feature.
Another point is that among calm and kind people, there are a lot of people who simply cannot be humiliated. And this works like a red rag on those “energy vampires” who like to bring other people suffering, insult them. Why such immunity to humiliation? Everything is simple. First of all, kind and calm people treat everyone with condescension. Simply put, it is easier for them not to pass through all the unpleasant words that come to their address, but to “feel sorry” for the person who uttered them. They are well aware that no mentally stable, happy person will just say nasty things to another. That's the philosophy.
By trying to humiliate calm people, others try to assert themselves, confirm their status in society or in the company. There can be many reasons for this – the main thing is that most kind people simply do not react to these words. And this is not just an external equanimity. They really don't care at all.
in order to provoke a calm person, loosen up, destroy kindness in him) and continue communication at this level, understandable to the aggressor.
Psychological sadists are constantly looking for a victim. Since a rude and ill-mannered person will probably get an equally rude answer, they choose just kind, calm, well-mannered people as the target of attacks, hoping that they will not get back from them.
It is impossible to humiliate a calm person, simply because a really calm (psychoemotionally stable) person will absolutely not care what other people are gossiping about. Because what people say about you is actually their opinion, but it is not the fact of who you really are.
for example
I'll point at you and shout look at his green hair and start laughing…
What is your reaction?
a calm confident person will look and go their own way because they know that's not the case!
but the other will start to be shy, pull his hair with his hands, try to retreat because he tends to believe what others say and try on their opinion for himself.
it is the same with humiliation – if you accept humiliation, you are humiliated, and if you don't, then whatever they say will be all the same to you
Because they are calm and kind people:
In my understanding, calm and kind people generally come in two types::
1) confident: loving and respecting themselves and those who deserve their love and respect;
2) insecure: having low self-worth and low levels of personal energy.
The former possess methods of decent defense and protection of their “territory”. They have a sense of dignity, strong principles and a “red line” of inappropriate antics in their direction.
The latter only demonstrate kindness and calmness. They have kindness, but not calmness, as they “radiate” deep anxiety. Because they are suffering, they are easily touched to the quick. Here they are most often tried to humiliate the offenders.
They are not trying to humiliate someone because they are calm and kind. There are many reasons to dislike someone, ranging from prejudice to very serious real reasons. It is only with hooligan motives that they try to choose a victim based on the expected irresponsibility. In other cases, you should look for real reasons and considerations for aggression.
Because such people are very soft, they can be hurt and humiliated, and they will not say anything. Such people are easily manipulated, which is very convenient for the abuser. They seem like a “white crow”, which prevents them from earning respect and proving who they are. Also, they can't say anything to sarcastic speeches in their address, as they are very well brought up.
Watching them, you can see that they will better move away from quarrels and conflicts. If they are insulted, it's okay. They prefer to agree with the abuser rather than say something contrary to him. After all, if he says something, then he will not be able to stand up for himself. If they manage to stay in a certain group, then they try to stay there, because they are afraid of being expelled.
Christian answer: calm – meek and peaceful, kind – merciful, merciful…..such people are mentioned in the Beatitudes of the Gospel. The devil is not able to harm God directly, he “interacts” with individuals far from the Creator and through them (i.e., such people become an instrument ) tries to create evil, humiliating, insulting, morally and physically people who are characteristic, close to the Beatitudes.
WHAT MATTERS IS NOT THE DAY YOU WERE BORN, BUT THE DAY THE LIGHT WAS BORN IN YOU
Kindness is often mistaken for weakness, and people often suffer from it, but the main thing is not to stop being true to your light.Often, many people underestimate the worldview, neglect pink glasses, and even in thick frames. Often such people are silent, but not because they don't have something to say.
Kindness and calmness are at odds with modern society, which dictates its own rules. Kindness and calmness are knocked out of the current and stand out. What stands out attracts the attention of what overshadows. And the gray mass doesn't like it.
No matter what, no matter who, stay true to yourself by strengthening your vision / thought reasoning.Don't be afraid to keep your heart open. Everything always borders on honesty and impartiality.
Believing in yourself, in yourself, without betraying both sides – yourself/the environment.
A personality is formed that is free for so much more than it is supposed to be.
Usually such people do not break the system, they build it. What others don't dare do.
It turns out shine?!
Because because of his kindness, a kind person rarely contradicts other people, it is difficult for him to refuse someone anything, scold someone, or just make it clear that he is uncomfortable with a conversation on a specific topic.
People view this behavior as permission to invade their privacy.
Therefore, over time, his family, friends and acquaintances begin to break the personal boundaries he has built.
They are interested in intimate details of his personal life, meddle in his relationships, give unsolicited advice; criticize what he does.
And when he does have the courage to say that he doesn't like such pressure and interference, he will be convinced that they didn't mean to offend and that they simply didn't understand each other.
And this behavior will be repeated again, and he will again give the person a chance and forgive him, believing in the sincerity of what he said.
A calm person
A person who is at rest, sedentary. Full of calm, devoid of worries, worries. Being quiet, not bothering, not annoying. Comfortable, pleasant.
Good man
A person who does good to others, is sympathetic, and has such qualities as: A kind soul. Kind eyes. He is kind to anyone.
The habit of pushing aside your own needs to the last plan
Such a person will contribute a great deal of time, effort, and other siphoned-off internal reserves to other people.
He is not able to miss those who are discouraged, feel uncomfortable; he wants something that he can not afford for himself.
He agrees to put his own needs and aspirations to the last plan, only to present the person with personal support and correct the situation that has formed.
Such an action turns into a habit over time, which is just as difficult to get rid of, as well as from smoking or alcohol addiction.
He is now unable to put himself in the first place, feels an urgent need to use his own reserves for someone else.
Forgetting that not everyone is worth his kindness, because at times when he personally needs support, only a few people will provide it.
Difficulties with trust
Many people understand the phenomenon of kindness in the absence of a noticeable prerequisite for this as something dubious.
They seek out the secret arguments of such an action, seek to unravel the good-natured person, and refrain from receiving his support out of doubt.
A person who simply can't get past someone who needs their support. Often reacts to the reactions of people around him very painfully, not understanding why they do not rely on him.
The habit of asking for forgiveness just like that
This person is characterized by continuous independent apologies.
He simply does not like it when people do not have a positive attitude, they are offended or saddened, for this reason-even if they have not done anything wrong-they ask for forgiveness, simply so that their friend can feel more successful.
However, if a person apologizes, he thereby takes away the blame.
Good people regularly burden themselves with extraneous responsibility for phrases and actions that they did not say and did not carry out at all.
The same thing is allowed to say about the situation, if they ask for forgiveness for the resulting skirmish or violent conflict.
One person takes responsibility for this, despite the fact that in fact, in any two-way incident, both of them are guilty.
However, the one who apologizes almost all the time is good-natured, but not the one who is guilty.
Indifference to his dilemmas
A kind person will always take the time, listen, and provide any possible support.
However, in moments when he himself has a need for care and help, the people around him remain indifferent to his problems.
Not everyone can oppose good for good; not everyone has the internal reserves that they can expend in support of someone else.
They are simply not disturbed by extraneous feelings, and they are only willing to take, without giving anything in return.
Good people rarely dare to communicate their own needs and seek support for them.
Often, they continue to expect that someone will see their torment and decide to support them without asking or forcing them.
Inability to say no to people
Good people often take a lot of responsibility for themselves, as it is difficult for them to refuse a person's wishes.
If he is merciful and also honest, he is unlikely to be able to distract from those around him and their feelings, and in case of disagreement, he will reproach himself for a long time.
However, if they do not know how to say a hard “no” at all — they will be faced with many difficulties and questions that other people simply do not want to overcome.
They need to learn how to protect their own judgment and properly manage existing resources.
Otherwise, he will be a simple target for those who prefer to manipulate people through pity and guilt.
There is absolutely nothing terrible if he refuses a person: he can always resort to someone else.
Discontent as well as disillusionment with the people around you
A person who can help those around them find a solution to their difficulties, and then faces rejection, is sure to expect disappointment in people.
Also, this process will proceed very negatively, due to the fact that a good person honestly believes in the best human qualities.
Even after he is denied support, he learns discontent and other feelings that we call negative.
They can break friendships, fall in love, and cause trust problems.
In advance or belatedly, all good people, without exception, meet with this, for this reason, first of all, rather than diligently helping someone, it is necessary to make sure that in the future they will not regret their own act.
Habit of attracting toxic people
Toxic people target those who stand out for being kind-hearted and compassionate.
A good person is not able to identify distinct individual facets, quickly give an answer, think first of all about himself, for this reason he becomes a simple target for narcissistic persons, manipulators and people in the position of the victim.
He tries his best to support absolutely everyone around him, not noticing if his friendliness and dedication are taken unceremoniously used for mercantile purposes.
Kindness prevents him from looking the truth in the eye, and also from realizing that it is necessary to rush as far as possible from such people.
Failure to meet established goals
Success is achieved by those who define themselves and their own needs in the first place, can fight for their own interests; focus on this, what is considered more significant for them.
It is difficult for a good person to fight for the personification of their own intentions and goals, because the very idea of “struggle” implies a lack of support and internal resources, as well as manipulation.
Good people will not mercilessly rush forward without noticing their rivals or competitors.
They will come to a standstill, they can help them, they will provide guidance, they will use up their own time and energy, and in the end they will not be enough to fulfill what they planned.
Unwillingness to defend one's own judgment and range of interests
A good person will not enter into violent discussions, will not criticize those around him; will not directly state what does not satisfy him.
He will prefer the position of a taciturn listener and observer, even if his judgment is not taken into account or he is asked to act contrary to his own interests, he is unlikely to express his own position.
His unwillingness to offend and upset the people around him is against him.
Because it's safer than trying to humiliate the irritable and angry.
And if the site engine requires a long answer, I will add that the desire to humiliate someone comes from a sense of inferiority, and someone who is confident in himself does not need to humiliate others in order to feel on top.
Because in this way, the stupid try to rise safely above the rest. Because a calm and friendly person is considered weak. Which can be safely humiliated, thereby, as it were, exalting yourself. This is a very bad behavior style for a reasonable person, but most unfortunately do so. Stupidly demonstrating their alleged strength, along the line of least resistance
There are two ways to assert yourself in society.
The first (which requires considerable effort) is the path of intellectual and spiritual development. A person asserts himself at the expense of his own development.
The second is the path of devaluation, humiliation, moral suppression, and violence.
A person, in order to assert himself, devalues and humiliates the people around him and, of course, chooses those who do not respond to aggression with aggression – kind, calm, intelligent, educated people.
Often people mistake kindness for weakness and sacrifice. If the other person is in the state of an aggressor (and we all periodically get into this state), then the “victim” who happens to be nearby is a trigger for aggression.
And if a good person has well-built boundaries, other people very quickly understand who they are dealing with and retreat. If the boundaries are not aligned, then there is a high probability of falling into the position of “victim”
And for every victim, there is a stalker. The law of attraction.
But “sacrifice” is a very strong position, sometimes people are unconsciously driven into sacrifice. I am good – he is bad, he is guilty, and I am a saint, I am kind and good against his background.
In our time, kindness and calmness are regarded as a weakness
Weak person – is not able to fight back, offend, humiliate
That's what public opinion thinks
Boris Grebenshchikov once told a parable:
In one eastern country, in one village, there lived an old wise martial artist. One day, when he was teaching a class with his students, he was approached by a young fighter known for his rudeness and cruelty. His favorite technique was provocation: to make the opponent lose his temper, so that he, blinded by rage, accepted the challenge, made mistake after mistake, and as a result lost.
This young fighter began to insult the old man: he threw stones, spat and swore with the last words. But the old man remained unperturbed and continued his studies. At the end of the day, the irritated and tired bully went home, admitting defeat.
The disciples were surprised that the old man took out so many insults and asked him:
The old master said:
If someone comes up to you with a gift and you don't accept it, who will the gift belong to?
To my former master, ” one of the apprentices replied.
The same goes for envy, hatred, and swearing. As long as you don't accept them, they belong to the person who brought them.
Conclusion: do not take to heart what evil and narrow-minded people say. Let their evil remain with them.
It is impossible to humiliate a person if he is not ready to feel humiliated. This feeling arises from an inadequate assessment of yourself. An inadequate assessment arises from pride. Pride is an inner, deeply hidden sense of superiority. Any doubt about their own superiority in such a person causes a sense of humiliation. Those who humiliate such people, most often do it unconsciously. It's like being in a packed train. Unnecessary ambitions get in the way of a person, like a big backpack on his shoulders. Everyone will cling to it. Consider that the person who humiliated you has made you think again about the extra burden that is burdening you with unnecessary suffering, and it is better to get rid of it.
I wouldn't use the word “calm”in this question. If a person is calm inwardly, then he already has inner strength and it is difficult to offend such a person. But if a person does not show emotions outwardly, but inside he has a storm of” offensive ” emotions, then he needs to work on himself. And there is no point in feeling sorry for such a person. He needs to be helped: directed to actions to acquire an “inner core”.
People who do this are afraid to humiliate their own kind, easier than those they think are weaker. After all, many of them think that if a person is kind, it means weak.
But in most cases, this is not the case.Good people are strong-minded people. They never offend those who offend them. The good ones don't stoop to the level of abusers. And abusers are weak people, with their own fears, complexes, and experiences. Such people should not be afraid,they need to be helped)
The answer to this question lies in who harbors such intentions.
In simple terms, the main misconception of some people is that they take kindness and calmness for weakness.
Therefore, in our society today, many people are “aggressive” – this is the imprint of the 90s. Such people are usually in companies just like them, for example, teenagers of the smoking type, listening to music all over the yard… They consider it normal, and for some who were born and raised in a different environment, it is no longer normal for them, as both sides believe. In general, many people find others strange because “'he's not like me'”.
A new student came to our school, spoke quietly, did not contact anyone and was afraid to say anything, and there were people in the class that I have already told you about… they began to mock him that he was strange, that he was not like them, but on the one hand he did not pay attention to it, and they also stopped paying attention to him.
Perhaps the question was a little different, I understood it like this
The level of education of the society. This is the main factor. The second is animal instincts. A calm and kind person is, on the part of society or the herd, a weak person. In fact, it may be different.
But the main thing is that we change this approach in society. And even more important than the question ” why so?”.
Specifics would help me 🙂
What kind of people? You? A friend of yours?
Who is trying to humiliate you? Someone you know?
In my therapy group, there is a very calm and” kind ” person, so kind that he is afraid to show feelings, because someone may not like his feelings. All his monologues and dialogues do not have any emotional color, but only logical judgments. As a result, it remains a kind of impersonal structure, which is impossible to approach, in fact, it remains alone. Among other things, it causes aggression of other participants due to unsuccessful contact attempts. This is one example, and there can be many reasons. In the group, of course, humiliation is forbidden, but I think that if it had happened outside the group, the outcome might have been different.
First, most often this is done in full view of others, they want to show themselves so combative, which can humiliate,crush under themselves, in general, the winner of the type.In general, by harassing the weak, he wants to show that he has power, which shows him to be strong.When meeting one – on-one, it's not always impudent.And impunity, the one who greyhounds, feels fearless.Most often, because he himself experienced fear and helplessness from the elders and strong.
Because entities have ceased to believe in deities, to believe in the human soul. People began to live in corrupt countries and live mostly according to the concepts of prisoners, because it looks cool, solid and respectable. In addition, according to the same concepts, calmness and kindness can be put on as a mask by criminals.
Kindness is mistaken for weakness!!! But sometimes they are often offended… for a good man in anger is more terrible than any other… kindly kill, kindly bury 🤷 ♂ ️
The human EGO tries to humiliate the other. It, the top of the earthly man, is higher, as long as he lives by animal instincts there is nothing. The ego can be elevated by accepting the laws of the Higher World. But this is labor. usually, the EGO is elevated by trying to humiliate other Egos in front of it, and it seems to it that it has soared above the world, although in fact it has remained in place. But the main thing is that they try, sometimes very hard, to humiliate good people, yes. But to humiliate, or not, it is up to each kind person individually. The animal ego, in this case, having wasted its energy on humiliating the other, gets all its dirt in return, and goes wild. Up to bouts of self-harm.
The attitude of some people to others is not related to what the opponent is. When a person expresses himself in the world (whether it is an attitude to another person, nature, a situation, or to himself), this expression shows his level of spiritual development and philosophy in general.
People's attitude towards us is never something personal, it is always THEIR opinion about us, Their view formed on THEIR values and worldview, and never our behavior or actions.
A vivid example is the situation when a gang of bullies, walking down the street, picks up a calmly walking passerby. The point is not that the passerby went wrong, but that the original goal of the gang was to express the accumulated anger at someone and thereby feel better and once again show himself who he, in his opinion, is.
Another question is that such opposites often converge. Some need to express their anger and thereby strengthen their own image of themselves, while others need to find confirmation for themselves of their pity, evil and cruel world, etc.
Simply put, everyone finds confirmation of their ideas about the world and themselves.
If a calm and quiet person has such situations in life and wants to avoid them in the future,then the first thing you need to work with is your own view of the world, yourself and what you expect from life. Changing someone other than yourself is a useless and stupid thing to do.
Firstly, they can't respond to aggression with aggression, secondly, they can get rid of their own kind: you can lose your teeth, it's easier to cooperate with such people and create a bandit group, and thirdly: to assert themselves in their stupidity (I'm not joking). The new world-the world of chaos dictates: snatch more under the guise and there will be no punishment – this is the fourth. Some people are so clever in the world of chaos, using it as a screen, that they manage to rob, kill and humiliate many people at once, believing that everything will get away with it. And some even make a show out of all their bad deeds and compete with each other in coolness, etc.. But they are still waiting for a prison and a mess made of incomprehensible things.
They try to humiliate everyone. Just a calm, kind person will not react aggressively to this, so he is the closest target. You can be calm and kind, but you need to learn to beat your head
P.S. An important nuance. You don't need to hit someone. But to be able to hit – it is necessary
Kindness and calmness are a sign of inner harmony. They act as a kind of indicator of the happiness that a person strives for. According to the laws of the universe, like attracts like. Therefore, where there is really kindness and calmness, there are no hard feelings.
But if, nevertheless, something or someone with their actions or words disturbed the peace. This is your universe telling you. You are directed where to look, what you need to do or what you don't need to do. A person does not react to what is not in him, what is alien to him.
The brunette is not offended by the statement that “all blondes are stupid”, because this is not about her, there is no blondiness in her, it is alien to her.
The feeling of resentment tells us where our growth zone is, what we need to work through or accept in order to get one step closer to a state of happiness.
Probably because they irritate the nervous, angry. They just get high trying to piss off the people they envy. It is their calmness, equanimity and self-confidence.
Why do they try to humiliate kind and calm people? This is done because from kind and calm people, the humiliator has little chance of being beaten.
I believe that people who try to hurt others are the most miserable creatures in the world. And I agree with the previous speaker. Envious people really want to be noticed. They do it, but in a negative way.
There is a good joke on this topic: A man got lost in the woods. He stands and shouts: “Ow, ow, ow!” Someone taps him on the shoulder from behind. Turns around-a bear. Bear: “Man, why are you yelling?” The guy “Got lost, maybe someone will hear.” Bear: “Well, I heard, did you feel better?”
Another good example is: the characters of all sorts of animated series and movies. There is always a hero who is handsome, well done and talented. The best example is the Adventures of Jimmy Neutron boy genius. There was a heroine who constantly pestered him. Her name was Cindy Vortex. Now, she's the school's first beauty who's jealous of him. And all her misadventures continue as long as she hates the hero. Eventually, it recognizes and builds relationships. Or another case of How To Train Your Dragon. There are similar characters: Bully, Badass, and Snotlout. To a certain extent, Astrid. Same story.
It's the same in real life. At school and at the institute, especially. Although at work, too, such things happen. Aggressive people often tease calm and quiet people, but their colleagues(friends) also get hurt. Responding to such people is pointless. They won't understand anyway. To be honest, such people end up badly. Either their fate takes them far, or they suffer for many years after their achievements. In extreme cases, they get drunk.
As for calm and active people. They make a career and usually get married successfully. There are actually a lot of such people, but many are afraid of bullies. The bold one will not react. Moreover, more often their own people complain about the bully. I know this firsthand. I studied with them myself. Hopeless guys, sometimes. But I believe that everything worked out for them. God willing.
Unfortunately, even at work, these are common. They are usually dismissed quickly (sometimes not quickly). And they blame nerds and others for it. Trying to rein them in turns out to be a failure even for parents. Parents may be too late to understand this, or they may be just like their children. It is possible that they also have normal relatives. But they prefer to stay away from them. Their children, by the way, can be born normal. Another thing is that such parents constantly press their children too. In general, this whole story is sad. Either they gather a conglomerate of dubious personalities around them, or they are left alone. Because children can leave them sooner or later. Or problems with organs, and in addition with health. So guys, don't take bad examples. Better work hard, then you will succeed!
Man has become the dominant species on earth because he is the most aggressive animal. We are biologically aggressive. Weak and kind people are an opportunity to safely express their aggression. From the strong, you can also get hurt. Therefore, weak and kind people are more often attacked and humiliated. This is our biological nature.
People are more likely to project their personal fears and resentments onto their surroundings. Therefore, there is hardly anything related to the apponent in this action itself; most often, the target is chosen precisely by the person who continues to swing the pendulum and is led to provocations. Calmness and kindness have nothing to do with this, because it is only a model of behavior and reaction. But the internal state can stop such attacks, for example, if you do not react negatively either externally or internally, but simply ignore them.
What does being calm and kind mean to you? I assume that for you this means the one who CAN be humiliated, that is, a person with low self-esteem who does not love himself and does not respect. These are all beliefs. If a person has everything in order with self-worth and love, then such a Person will not be humiliated…and you don't want to do it….what we say about others is about us, and what others say about us is about them.
No schmuck will risk humiliating a calm and kind person, because a good person is always strong. And they humiliate those who pretend to be kind and calm. They humiliate wolves in sheep's clothing.
Because they do not show a sufficient level of “dominance”, which is a consequence of their character.
Therefore, for not very intelligent individuals, they are “delicious bait”, due to which you can raise your authority in the society of your own kind.
Because other people, their line of behavior is unsettling. Insecure people are bothered by the confidence of kind and calm people who are unshakable and are not going to prove anything to anyone.
For comparison, here is a metaphor:
Imagine that you live in complete poverty. Barely make ends meet. You are surrounded only by beggars like you. And then, all of a sudden, you're surrounded by a man who drives a sports car, speaks on a platinum blackberry, lives in a mansion, and eats lobster every day. Such a person will very quickly start to annoy your eyes. Even if he doesn't make any attacks on you. It doesn't intersect with you at all. He's just living his life because he's used to living it. It just only catches your eye occasionally. And it pisses you off. You just can't figure out what its secret is? Why are you and everyone else struggling to make ends meet, and he just went and lived differently? You can't help but wonder why he was able to, but you can't.
It's the same with the people you mentioned in your question.
The world is certainly not divided into beggars and rich people, this is just an exaggerated metaphor to the extreme. Because everyone in this life is looking for their own happiness, which is not measured by material benefits. However, the external signs of happy people who have achieved complete harmony, expressed in their calmness and noble mood, unsettle those unfortunate people who have not been able to achieve harmony. So they hope to assert themselves in this way.
It is not true, they humiliate not the calm and kind, but those who cannot fight back, and first of all they are not morally ready to resist. Alas, but good must be done with fists. Calm and kind people with this quality usually become leaders, so that's it.
In Russia, from poverty and hopelessness, there is a lot of aggression everywhere, domestic rudeness, bad manners, drunks, cattle and gopnik, the police work not for the benefit of citizens, but for the peace of the authorities, protecting corruption and crime and stuffing their own pockets. Fights and showdowns arise out of the blue, absolutely everyone is ready to use violence. Even the priests. The people as a whole are embittered, as they do not see prospects.
This is not the case in the West, where it is much safer.
And the direct answer is that the fish rots from the head. All the negativity comes from the government, from such management. Why, once abroad, in human conditions of life, guest workers immediately begin to behave in a human way, so that they do not differ in anything from local residents? Haven't you thought about it?
Yes, just because the restless and unkind will not be able to humiliate. It's more expensive for yourself. They'll humiliate anyone they want. At some point, the shaman who wants to raise his self-esteem or defuse his nerves, take out evil on someone, will get a tambourine, and that's all over. And it is in Russia (out of all European countries) that the people are most ready to use their fists. Therefore, it is a thousand times correct to say that good must be done with fists. Objects of bullying gopnik just become good, but defenseless people.
The program of education of an English gentleman necessarily included physical training, running, swimming, cycling, boxing, wrestling and hand-to-hand combat techniques. And on the evening walk not the most fashionable streets of London worthy sons of lords went out with a favorite cane. A walking stick, or rather a whole stick, was made hollow and filled with molten lead. Outwardly elegant accessory was actually a heavy and formidable weapon, with which a gentleman could fend off a whole pack of gopnikovs and even break the skull of the most intractable.
Read the Sherlock Holmes stories. He repeatedly put in the place of an arrogant boor with boxing talents or a club.
Because a calm and kind person will not be able to insult or hit back, in general, will not show aggression. By humiliating the defenseless, the abuser tries to amuse self-esteem and assert himself.
From time immemorial, they never climbed on those who are stronger, twitchy and ready to fight back. What in History is what it is now. After all, calm and kind people do not see danger and understand that they will not be able to respond. And many at the expense of those who can not answer, assert themselves.
The apparent lack of action and lack of arrogance are fascinating. Well, it is clear that the” king ” is more profitable to see yourself, you can order to command. If a person humiliates you, this is a sure sign that he longs to be your master.
Everyone is extremely simple to use the situation, knowing that in response to them navrd whether that will happen. This applies to both work (the director yelled at the boss, the boss went all this *avno vylel on specialists, etc.) and ordinary situations. They do this primarily for themselves, to feel that you can also humiliate/offend (it doesn't matter who), usually of course weak, but quite often a person is just reserved, but not weak at all
Hello, most likely (purely hypothetically) such “people “see in the kind attitude shown to others a certain” manifestation ” of my weakness.
This is based on the theory from life experience that people are mostly angry m-zi who are not able, are no longer able to adequately perceive the bright message in their direction.
That's something like this
Because the ultimate goal of humiliation is to seize power in a social group, and weak people who have no experience defending their territory (their power) often hide behind a mask of kindness and assumed calm. Therefore, it is more profitable for the aggressor to approach a calm person first of all – the probability that he will turn out to be a patient person is very high.
Because man is still a representative of the animal world, and there are patterns of behavior sewn into our deep consciousness, which is the main atavism of the human race and is unlikely to ever disappear, at least not in an evolutionary way. Man is a herd animal. Therefore, a program of embedding in the social rank system of relations is stitched into our minds. The most primitive way that the entire animal world uses is to identify the physically and mentally weaker ones in order to take an authoritative position above them.
If in the animal world the method of identifying yourself as weaker than yourself is the simplest – show your fangs, claws,voice power, and only if the opponent is not impressed by this, enter into a real fight to test your fighting skills, then with the development of intelligence in primates, methods become more elegant. The confrontation between power and intelligence is already beginning. But, unfortunately, as long as society is built on the ideology of obtaining personal benefits in the form of rank privileges, humiliating calmer, kinder people will be a priority for humanity.
The answer is simple. Calm, kind person, more reasonable in life situations. To others, they seem incomprehensible, and on this basis there is a desire to assert oneself through insults and humiliation, because it is always easier than to calmly resolve conflicts.
Many people would answer this question like this – because these people cannot or do not want to get involved in a conflict and respond with aggression to aggression. Or, that they are weak-willed, weak-willed, experiencing a certain fear of pressure… Can be assumed and evaluated in different ways. I will approach this question from the other side – from the position of the Teaching given to people by the Higher Cosmic Mind, which gives a simple explanation of why such complex relationships between people occur in society. Why there are people who try to humiliate and insult others. And there are non-confrontational, wise people who will not respond to provocative attacks or ridicule from others, realizing that responding with evil to evil, exchanging the usual : “You are a fool-you are a fool” – no one will ever come to peace.
In a simple altercation, two best friends can become bitter enemies. This is a war between two kindred Spirits. Two Souls who were supposed to give each other warmth and joy, now suffer, throwing clods of sticky mud at each other, which even time will not wash away.
Two Souls, two particles, descended to Earth from the Vast Cosmos from the Great Sphere of Love, and incarnated in a physical body for a reason. These two kindred Spirits (two fractals from a multibillion-dollar set of such kindred souls created by God) came to learn how to do good. Love absolutely everything that the human Soul comes in contact with, and develop many bright qualities, such as mutual understanding, compassion, trust in each other, and others. But the most important task was and is-not to lose touch with the Creator.
Today, the thread that connected people with God is broken. All of humanity has fallen into sin. Pride, humanity's gravest sin, now rules every soul. And Love should prevail – Divine, Forgiving.
A person who humiliates others, has allowed in his Soul exactly the quality from which he suffers. But you can't blame these people. Their soul thus resists and protests against society, intuitively feeling that something is wrong in their life. And how to achieve love for your Soul and harmonious relations with the surrounding space, a person does not know.
Harmonious relationships can only be achieved by rejecting negative character traits: anger, short temper, vindictiveness, vanity, self-interest and others, replacing them with the help of Unconditional and All-Encompassing Love, with positive energies – the energies of Love and Light.
It is necessary to take responsibility for your thoughts and actions, and embark on the path of spiritual development in order to learn to be open, merciful, listen to your heart and give yourself and this World Unconditional Love. And don't forget about forgiveness. Forgiveness is the only liberating force in the universe.
Having embarked on the path of self-improvement of your Soul, a person will climb the spiritual ladder. And the higher one's consciousness rises, the more blissful one feels, and there is also peace in the heart, silence and silence in the thoughts, and just joy without any reason. The greater the harmony within a person, the greater the harmonious relationship with the World, including with people.
On the basis of the Knowledge I mentioned at the beginning of this text, you can explain literally everything that happens in the World and in our country, including in every family, taking as a basis the Divine Canons. One of them explains the relationship between our actions and further consequences, this is how people say: “What I sowed, I reaped.” Therefore, it is better to sow good, and in the future to reap the harvest of goodness. But, the more egoistic qualities a person has-fear, anger, hatred, resentment, irritation, the stronger he receives retaliatory blows. In addition, his physical and energy bodies are destroyed. And these are diseases.
Life brings a lot of problems. And that's a good thing. After all, this is a life test. When life throws you a challenge in the form of ill-wishers, and you do not respond to it, you grow. What hurts the mind is the highest good for the Soul. This needs to be understood.
Every life situation, no matter how hopeless it may seem, is given for the benefit of personal growth of the Soul. It's like a strength trainer. Therefore, we must learn to live in joy, so that every moment is a celebration, and not a drama. See everything through the eyes of Love. Then the Soul will feel light and light. And there will no longer be those around a person who easily throws stones at the Soul. This is what I say from my personal life experience.
Why do they try to humiliate calm, kind people?
First of all, this is an illiterate question about a planned action that was not completed in time. Verbs do not combine with each other – they tend to implement the future in the present tense. “Trying” doesn't mean they're humiliating you.
However.
Why are they trying to humiliate you?
“Why” is rhetoric.
Why do they humiliate calm and kind people?
Mankurts don't care if you are calm, kind, angry or cruel.
“Trying to humiliate” is a common thing between people, because everyone wants to humiliate everyone.
Only stupid half-witted people do it for show, and cunning half-witted people do it on the sly.
And yet – “Try”, this is not about half-witted mankurts. These are smart people who try to prevent even involuntary humiliation of someone.
If the question was: “Why do they humiliate calm and kind people”? – I would give such an answer.
This is a child inferiority complex. People who didn't get rid of it with a refund are not uncommon. Realizing their mental limitations, they strive to rise up and get perverted moral satisfaction with impunity. And it doesn't matter if the people around him are smarter or not, relatives or colleagues, the first person they meet or the person from the queue – the main thing is to keep silent in response to the mockery, since these types will not reach into their pockets for a word, but for weapons.
But if you see that in your presence some people persistently try to humiliate others, “calm and kind people”, and, at the same time, they allow them to do this – the questions “Why” are already for you. Why didn't you stand up for them?
P.S.
If, in your opinion, there was a humiliation, and no one reacted, then this is not a humiliation, but a statement of fact. Sometimes you have to speak their language with the mankurts.
I sometimes ask myself this question,because our world is sometimes not fair.humiliate and insult truly kind and beautiful people who are needed in this world.And respect all sorts of creatures at the same time.
Because, probably, they do not feel rebuffed and believe that the person who humiliates them is a WEAK person…and according to the laws of the pack (humiliating and insulting-he is always from a PACK of the same, like him) weak – in the last rows … Well…and also because this is how those who have off-scale self-esteem or aggression above the roof,and self-esteem and self-confidence at zero,assert themselves.Therefore, a calm and kind person should have a solid inner core and be able to fight back…and this IS MANDATORY.
Because for immature individuals, they seem “weak”
And the songs begin with dancing, like teenagers. Do you want to feel better? Raise your self-esteem? Do it at the expense of another person 😃 👍
And suppose that the reason for humiliating people is not their calmness and kindness, but something completely different? We often search for the answer where it is not available, but it is convenient for us to search. Like lost keys under a streetlight.
The question is similar to why they kill good people or for nothing at all, just like that. An example of this is the murder of Alexander Abdulov's brother, which was committed by soldiers during the withdrawal of Soviet troops from Afghanistan.
I am a calm and kind Person, because I know that THE WHOLE WORLD is a THEATER. My channel is also called that on Yandex Zen. No one wants to humiliate me. So those who are humiliated are not so calm and kind. ♥ As they say: in a quiet pool of devils are found.
Because kindness is most often perceived as a weakness. And calmness, like the inability to fight back aggression. Therefore, it is very easy and fast to “drain” a decent dose of negativity on such people, and at the same time not get an answer in return.)
There are several main reasons: 1) The nonentity cannot forgive greatness, tries to humiliate and ridicule the opponent, so that it is not so bitter to realize their level; 2)No one canceled karma. 3)A test for the persistence of qualities, defining their boundaries, a kind of exam for maturity.
Perhaps this is due to the beautiful theory that when you forbid or dislike something in yourself, it annoys you in others. for example, you do not allow yourself to be kind, because you consider it a weakness. And immediately there is a reaction. Or, for example, a person who does not allow himself to get dirty and dirty, is terribly angry and avoids people who are not very neat
Humiliate …?? Or show yourself in your beliefs? probably such people create a situation that satisfies the mental drive and physics of their own existence. The interest of “soft” people quickly disappears, as well as the meaning of meetings in such cases without consciously accepting the conflict or moment or consciously distracting from such people.
because a person knows that his interlocutor is weak in spirit and he will not be able to respond in kind. a person is weak in character, does not know how to be rude, does not know how to humiliate. he's too soft-hearted to call other people names and humiliate them.
Because the world today is exceptionally competitive and discursive, external victory is considered a virtue here, but not inner peace, and even more so kindness (which, if it is genuine, is practically not shown externally).
First of all at present people do not appreciate the good not that they would appreciate it but there are even people who do not understand what good is�
And secondly, as they say, who monogo know he knows how to be silent� these people do not gafkaet dogs in response, because they are well aware that it is not necessary to become because of the dog . And that's why they just keep quiet�
And those people are humiliating themselves in this way�
Because people think that kindness is a sign of weakness. You need to be kind, but at the same time be able to defend your borders. because we have to take care of ourselves first.
They simply can't fight back, and so the quiet ones can become an “object of ridicule” by the so-called “outcast”. People who humiliate them take advantage of it and I vent my anger on them
Kind means weak. Among primitive people, it will be pecked at by those who are physically stronger. If you didn't give a tough rebuff from the first attempts (even if they beat you), then everyone will peck at you. Many left this way and for a long time, after which, the primitive team already respects those who were pecked yesterday. And as a result, years are lost, family and many others. aponent lost his health, and even his life.
Because capitalism and democracy sow selfishness as an end in itself. How many good-natured people were there in the USSR and where are they now ? The more parasitic the properties of a social system, the more cynical and surrogate its “values”are. Altruism is a program of self-destruction for capitalism, when relationships are more important than profits.
I think we are talking here about those calm and kind people who do not see “vanity in vanity”, namely calmly and kindly relate to those things, some human actions and situations in life that their opposites are used to focus on… And this is by no means a human weakness or strength, it is an inner intuitive wisdom, to which, alas, restless and unkind people have not yet grown up…