3 Answers

  1. I didn't really understand, to be honest, the essence of the question…

    If we are talking about why it is not necessary to ask for forgiveness in principle and never, then I personally think that this is a wrong question, asking for forgiveness when I am guilty of something or have done something bad to someone, even if unintentionally, is not just worth it, but absolutely necessary.

    If we are talking about a particular case, I would not apologize for what I am not guilty of: my gender, height, age, ethnic origin, religious and philosophical views. Even if someone is offended or upset by the fact that I am a Jew, I will not apologize for it.

    If I see that my words or actions do not cause harm or harm to another person, but they are hurt by their own reaction or cognitive dissonance, then I will not apologize, but I will express understanding of their feelings and regret for the result.

  2. The request for forgiveness, which is almost the same, the apology is a ritual of social grooming – when it's something that's impossible to fix, as it's already happened, you can convey to people that had no intention to cause him inconvenience that you are not an asshole and not an enemy that happened by chance, and he did not have to worry if he is close with the enemy/a dick. The purpose of the ritual is to reduce anxiety, tension, and aggression. So it is necessary to ask, even purely ritually.

  3. In general, this is a question of the integrity of a particular person, on the one hand, or in a certain kind of stupidity, on the other. Foolishness in the sense that for some people forgiveness is a sign of weakness. At the same time, it is very difficult to distinguish integrity from stupidity. I've never asked for forgiveness in a quarrel before, throwing everything away to the act of reconciling the person I offended with myself. It seems that he should come to forgive me himself, thereby giving me some chance to normalize relations and further “redemption”. Now I think this is a bit strange, although the essence probably lies in different value intentions. In any case, I can't say that the question of admitting my own weakness, in my variation of rationalization of this question, was even raised. � �

    The person's response in the comments is also true. Why ask for forgiveness when it costs nothing? Probably true, many acts of asking for forgiveness, and then accepting it , are just a meaningless declaration of the fact of normalization of relations between people. And so it is in most cases, which does not beg for real remorse and real forgiveness, I know from my own experience.�

    As a matter of fact, we see that everything depends on value constellations. Either we are guided by some concepts and principles, or we act pragmatically.

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