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The steps are simple:
1. Write down everything that bothers you on a piece of paper. For example, “I'm constantly worried about my job / career.”
2. Take responsibility for it.
“If I was able to bring myself to this state, then I can change it.”
3. Identify the beliefs that hide behind your problems. What would I call myself when I see this situation?
For example, “I am worthless”, ” I am unlucky “, “I will never make a career”, ” I am a loser/prostrate! “
4. Change these programs, installations: to do this, you need to find the root causes: the first events that caused these programs to appear.
For example, my mother would say , ” You're stupid! “, ” You will achieve nothing! “
5. With the help of any trance technique, for example, breathing or EMDR, or wingwave, you need to return to that situation and forgive your mother and yourself for thinking that you were stupid for so many years. And so on for each belief.
6. Download (accept) the new program. “I'm successful! “, “I easily make a career! “
5 and 6 : I'm not sure that you can do this yourself.I help you do this in 3-4 sessions.
Well, then set a goal, a program on how to make it so that the work brings joy, and the career moves easily.
There are a lot of useful videos here on my channel https://youtu.be/V96wm_UPu1Q
There is a midlife crisis, and there is a crisis of 30 years. Approximately for the same reasons, in general, everything is the same.
I found out that there is such a thing only after I started studying to be a psychologist.
A-completed it in full: with a change of family, profession, or place of residence. Classic expanded version.
You know, this has provided a very large resource, probably for life. I am a melancholic and introvert, and I have a lot in common with Eeyore the donkey by nature.
And it was a huge experience: to be in a storm and get back to a very decent level-in earnings, in professional skills, in relationships.
I know in my head, and my skin now knows , that we can handle a huge number of possible unforeseen situations. Indeed, this dramatically reduces anxiety, and increases the pleasure of life.
Well, the army in its time, yes, – when a home boy, an 18-year-old sophomore meda got into a naval construction battalion on the other side of the country for two years, – also a good support in the same sense that-wow, – passed, adapted. But the army is a specific experience, it might have been more useful to me in prison, ugh, ugh, stay – well, not calm and cheerful, but in some kind of balance. Judging by the stories of the guys who came to our unit from the zone, this is a very consonant experience.
In my case, it was a set of measures. I understood a little about the nature of my own being. For example, it was a huge discovery for me that my ego, my personality , is not really me. I am something else. From here, a huge number of different changes danced. I do not know what led to this, but my level of awareness gradually began to increase. I began to realize that I was whining, or feeling sad, when I might as well not be. I even found that there is a moment when I literally make the decision to be upset or not, to be offended or not. The further I went, the more often I began to make the right choice, and more often I pulled myself back when I noticed that I was whining again. It was a big and lengthy job. I can't say it's complete. Perfection is still somewhere over the hill. But the results are already on the face.
With the help of strong autosuggestion. In addition to autosuggestion, I specifically presented myself as I want to see and specifically looked for ways to achieve this. I also overcame all this with the help of lucid dreams.
This may sound strange, but my military service helped me.
In short, so. I served in 2012. Before the army, I studied for 4 years at a state university. This is if it's official, and if it's not official, then I spent 4 years drinking furiously after school, sometimes tried light drugs, found comfort in nights with strangers and went for a walk in a similar way. I didn't earn any money during this time, although I had the opportunity, or rather, I earned it, but I didn't save a damn thing, everything was spent on the “needs”described above. I was terribly nervous, quick-tempered, and in general, if I met myself now, I would have stopped by the morla without thinking 🙂 And then, as much as I didn't want to, but also didn't mow, I joined the army. And so. Yes, it was hard at times, especially in the beginning, yes, there were situations for which I am ashamed, yes, BUT I read all the books that I had my eye on in civilian life, and when this list ended, I started to read many others (I read before the service, but there was not much time between entries)))), I thoroughly rethought my life and finally I set myself specific goals. Now I have a good job with excellent earnings in a large company, I eliminated unnecessary “friends”, I have a strong relationship with a girl (before that I had a relationship, but no more than 3 months), I rarely drink, quit smoking, fly to Europe for two months as a savage in the summer, go to the gym and pool, continue to develop spiritually and physically. I became much calmer and more cheerful.
And you know. Without the army, all this wouldn't have happened, because I often meet people with whom I hung out before and understand what I could become.